Title: Friendship Discovered-Love Found

Author: Chryss

Rating: PG

Shipper: W/A

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. No copyright infrigment intended.

Spoilers: Season 4 finale of Buffy, Season finale of Angel

Authors note: This is my first fic so please let me know if you like it or even if you think it really sucks, send feedback to chrystalpwl@prodigy.net Sorry Angel doesn't come until the end of this part He'll be their more in the next part



Part 1

Willow sat up in bed as she awoke from another disturbing dream. The night at Buffy's had given her a lot of insight, revealing what she had been hiding in her subconscious. She had to stop lying to herself. She thought she had changed a lot since her high school years, but lately she had been doubting that anyone perceived her any differently. She kept seeing herself as the same old Willow, instilling worry and nervousness in her demeanor. She wondered if she would ever be viewed as anyone other than the shy hacker/witch. While her physical appearance had changed, so had her mentality, yet everyone treated her as if she were no different. She was afraid that anything new she might do would be frowned upon. She didn't want to hear, "Willow that's not like you," or "Are you feeling alright."

She was no longer sure of her relationship with Tara. Her feelings weren't completely solid. Maybe she had reached to Tara because it was a relationship separate from her current friends, or because it was the exact opposite of what anyone would have expected. Maybe she really did have feelings for her. She really didn't know anymore.

Willow looked at her clock, 1:00. She knew she wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. She went downstairs to get a glass of water, then returned to her room and logged on her computer. She checked her e-mail, most of which was junk mail. Then she noticed an e-mail from Cordelia.

Willow and Cordy had been e-mailing eachother with weekly updates on their lives since shortly after Cordy had started working for Angel. Cordelia was often bored sitting up in the office all day long so she started going on-line. Eventually she decided to put her and Willow's past behind her and called her, since Willow was the only one she could really stand in Sunnydale. They had a long conversation and Willow gave her her e-mail address, and they had slowly become good friends.

Hey Willow,

What's going on in Sunnydale. Sorry I haven't written in a couple weeks. Things have been stressful around here. I was in the hospital along with Wesley. And Angel is freaked. His building blew-up. It's really too much to write. You have my number, so call and I'll explain everything. Gotta go. Love Cordelia

With everything Willow had been going through it was good to hear from Cordy.

Hey Cordy,

I guess everything is alright here, but you should never say that on the Hellmouth. I can't believe you told me all that and aren't going to explain exactly what happened. You better be expecting a call from me. Willow

Just then her IM dinged:

Hotbabe156: Hey Willow what are you doing up at 1:30

Redwicca23: Couldn't sleep, I was just emailing you, so what exactly happened

Hotbabe156: Well do you remember what I told you about Wolfram and Heart and the scrolls

Redwicca23: yeah

Hotbabe156: Well the law firm decided to . . . (she went on to explain all that happened)

Redwicca23: Oh my God are you okay, you must have been in so much pain.

Hotbabe156: Yeah I'm fine now just a little wigged. Plus I have Angel and Wesley's support

Redwicca23: How are they?

Hotbabe156: They're doing okay. They are staying here for now. And their both a little weird about the new me

Redwicca23: The new you ???

Hotbabe156: Yeah well after seeing all of the suffering I became more serious about saving the innocent

Redwicca23: And Angel is going to be human?

Hotbabe156: Yep but not anytime soon. How are you?

Redwicca23: Stressed, after the whole Initiative thing I told you about we had a movie night at Buffy's and got stuck in these weird dreams of our subconscious

Hotbabe156: Are you alright

Redwicca23: Yeah, it just made me think a lot

They went on talking until 3:30 in the morning. Cordelia could tell how much stress Willow was under and invited Willow to come visit for a few weeks. She would be leaving the day after tomorrow.

Part 2

Willow felt really bad just leaving her friends behind, she knew they were having as much stress as her. She told them she was visiting a relative. She couldn't believe she lied. She hadn't seen Cordy forever and now she was standing in front of her door. She knocked on the door and Wesley answered.

"Willow! W-what are you doing here!?!"

"Oh my God Cordy didn't tell you I was coming!"

"Well most certainly not. It's nice to see you. Come in," he said shaking her hand.

Cordelia squeaked when she saw Willow, They met in the middle of the room and hugged tightly. They hadn't seen each other since they had become friends. "I'm so glad you decided to come. Sit down, Wesley will put your bag in the other guest room."

"Wow Cordy this is a nice place, I see why you went through hell to get it." As Willow said this a flower floated in front of her.

"Thanks, oh and this is my ghost Dennis."

"It's nice to meet you, I've heard a lot about you," she said to the said to the air.

Wesley walked into the guest room waking up Angel, who in turn growled . "What are you doing?"

"Putting Willow's bags in this room," he said as if it were the most obvious thing.

"Willow!" Angel quickly got up and went to go see what was going on. When he saw Willow he was more than shocked. What was she doing here? She looked as beautiful as he remembered.

He was surprised when he heard her gasp his name. She paused a moment before hugging him.

"It's good to see you Willow."

"You too-" She was cut off as an embarrassed, boxer-clad Angel quickly ran back and shut his room door.

Cordelia and Willow started laughing the second Angels room door shut. He returned to the living room five minutes later, fully dressed. If Angel could blush, he would.

"So what are you doing here Willow?" Angel asked.

"I-I’m sorry, I assumed that um Cordy would’ve told you I was coming. I didn’t mean to intrude, it’s j-just that I really needed a vacation. You know a break from hell mouth life. I-I, if I mean, well I can leave if you and Wesley want, I mean, not that I don’t want to be here with you. Oh that didn’t come out right."

"Willow," Angel tried.

"The next bus leaves in two hours, so if you don’t mind I’ll just stay here until then, then I can just leave. I’m sorry I thought you knew," Willow said standing about to retrieve her bags.

"Willow!" Angel said smiling.

"Uh. Yes."

"I never said I didn’t want you to say, I’d love for you to. I was just wondering why you were here."

"Oh."

"Besides if Angel or Wesley didn’t want you here then they could leave," Cordelia said smirking.

"I’m staying here just for a week or two, just visiting."

Willow hadn’t thought much of Angel with all that had been going on back in Sunnydale. She was only reminded of him in Cordy’s e-mails. But seeing him again stirred feelings of attraction that she thought had long since died. She had never really come to terms with her feelings about Angel before. He was always Buffy’s meaning off limits. So she had always pushed whatever feelings she may have had aside. Now that she was here she wasn’t so sure she could do that anymore. She knew he was still off limits even if Buffy and his relationship was long since over. She knew Buffy would still view him as hers. But that just wasn’t fair. Buffy had a current boyfriend that she claimed to love, so why does she have to be so selfish. Oh I don’t even know why I’m thinking this. It’s not even as if Angel has feelings for me. Get a Grip Willow.

"Okay wow, long uncomfortable silence anyone," Cordelia said just as Wesley walked in.

"If I may interrupt, Cordelia where might Willow be staying? Seeing as though there aren’t enough beds with Angel and I staying here."

"One of you guys are going to willingly give up your bed. This couch is a sofa bed," Cordelia stated matter of factly.

"Oh that’s alright I wouldn’t want to cause to much trouble I’ll just sleep on the couch."

"That’s alright Willow, I can," Angel offered

"Nope, I’ve already made up my mind," Willow stated firmly.

Although Angel hadn’t seen Willow’s resolve face many times before, but he recognized it. "Fine but I don’t have to like it."

"Okay, now that we have that settled. Willow I have so much planned for us to do. Today we’ll stay in, but tomorrow we’re going shopping and we’ll get you some decent party clothes, then we can spend the next two nights clubbing. Then we’re going to have a sleep over make over, oh and there's so much more."

"I told you the ‘new Cordelia’ wouldn’t last very long," Angel said to Wesley.

"Hey, I’m still changed if we get work, I’ll work happily, but until then I haven’t had a girlfriend over in way to long."

Angel and Cordelia are really sitting close, wonder what that’s about. She had been watching them and had noticed their closeness. Well there goes that.

Part 4

Today had been extremely exhausting for Willow. All she wanted to do now was sleep. She changed and then pulled out the sofa bed. They had all spent a few hours talking. Wesley seemed a lot less uptight, Cordelia and Angel seemed really close, and Angel seemed to laugh a lot more and brood a lot less.

Willow laid down and cuddled in her blankets after shutting off all the lights. She was really glad she decided to come. If she was really honest with herself she would admit that she had runaway from home. No one really knew where she was. She was feeling the desperate need for escape. All she wanted to do was cry in frustration. She felt really selfish knowing all her friends were having problems, she didn’t want to lean on them for comfort. That’s what she was there for, comfort. And she had runaway. How could she do that. Well it was to late to go back now. Decisions were already made. She was going to enjoy her stay if it killed her.

It took Willow a long time to fall asleep she had laid in bed simply thinking of all the decisions she had made, and all that had go so wrong in her life. Her friends didn’t seem to even really care about her anymore, Oz had left her, she had confused herself even more going to Tara. She wasn’t sure what she was doing with her life. She had lost interest in her schoolwork, and she had put all that was important to her either behind her or at risk.

She fell into a fitful sleep. Her nightmares causing her to toss and turn. She dreamt of her friends taunting her. Of all the pain she had experienced in the past year, bringing her to tears.

Angel was awoken by the sound of soft whimpering. He went into the hall to see where it was coming from. It was Willow. He went into the living room to see her crying in her sleep, only now she looked as though she were in physical pain. He wondered what could be causing her to experience this. He tried to gently wake her.

"Willow, willow wake up," he nudged her gently. She wouldn’t wake up so he tried to be a little more forceful. It wasn’t working. It was obvious that it wasn’t going to. Angel didn’t know what to do so he climbed into bed beside her. He pulled her into his arms, gently rubbing her back. She was shuddering. He felt so bad, wishing he could do something to ease her pain, but he couldn’t even wake her to see what was causing it. This feels so right, holding her warm body in my arms. She feels so small, fragile even. I never knew she was having any problems, I wish there was something I could do. Slowly she quieted. Her shaking ceased. He felt compelled to stay with her, but figured she wouldn’t be to happy about him being in her bed. He kissed her forehead and returned to his room.

"Sweet dreams Willow."

Angel went into the kitchen at 10:00 to eat breakfast. He
saw Willow still sleeping and carefully walked to go heat up some
blood. He sat in the living room and sipped his drink, eyes drifting
to Willow's resting form. Could she possibly be more beautiful.
She's just so innocent. Oz is a lucky man. What am I even
thinking. This is Willow. He continued to watch her long after he
finished his breakfast. Lost in his thoughts. Just seeing her
brought back a flood of memories of the past few years. Being alive
for so long you would think that a few years would be insubstantial,
but for Angel they were filled with substance and meaning. He was
now completely over Buffy. When she came to L.A. that last time it
had been the end all of his feelings. Sure he would always remember
that love that had so completely consumed him. She had just acted so
childish, rubbing the fact that she had moved on and yet expecting
him to never do the same. When he looked back she had often acted as
such. He had been so blinded by his infatuation that he couldn't see
her flaws. But wasn't love supposed to be blind. His eyes had
remained on Willow for the last hour, though it seemed to be only a
few minutes. She looked so perfect yet she didn't seem to notice.
She was so nice always putting herself last without so much as a
thought.

Angel began to think of the previous night. What disturbed
her so much. He didn't know of any problems she was experiencing,
but was determined to find out. How could he ask her without being
intrusive. That was the problem. He wanted to be there for her as
he knew she would be for him. She had given him his soul and he
never even thanked her. He needed to repay her some way. How, he
didn't know, how could you possibly repay some one for a gift as
priceless as a soul. He let out an unneeded sigh. She had only been
here a day and yet it was causing him to change so much. She seemed
to have that effect on everyone. Even Cordelia had accepted her as a
close friend when they had been total enemies.
What were these feelings he was experiencing. Willow was such an
angel. He always thought she was beautiful, intelligent, and kind,
but now these feelings were intensified. He had been attracted to
her before, but that was around the time he began his relationship
with Buffy. He remembered when he thought she was dead he had wanted
to die himself. He was so disappointed in himself for not being
there to protect that innocence.

Willow began to stir, her eyes fluttering open to focus on
Angels. And there they sat eyes locked, words not needed as a flood
of emotions were communicated. Green eyes lost in Brown depths, both
unable to move, to process thought, to speak. Neither knew what to
do, they couldn't do anything at all. Loosing all sense of time
their they sat without movement lost in the depths of emotions in
eachothers eyes.

"Angel!" Cordelia called from the hall.

The spell was broken.

Part 6



Willow began to stir, her eyes fluttering open to focus on Angel's. And
there they sat eyes locked, words not needed as a flood of emotions were
communicated. Green eyes lost in Brown depths, both unable to move, to
process thought, to speak. Neither knew what to do, they couldn't do
anything at all. Loosing all sense of time their they sat without movement
lost in the depths of emotions in each others eyes.



"Angel!" Cordelia called from the hall.



The spell was broken.



Willow shook her head slightly in a daze. She watched
Angel's retreating form wondering what had just transpired between them.
She had just woken up and been instantly been enraptured in his gaze.
Whatever the moment, the meaning, it was over thanks to Cordelia who just
always seemed to have the worst tact and timing.



Willow just laid in on the sofa bed thinking of Angel.
Being in L.A. was awakening past, forgotten feeling for Angel. She had
always been attracted to him, but he was always labeled Buffy's. But right
now Buffy wasn't here, right now Buffy was most likely lying in bed with
Riley. Right now Willow couldn't help but be attracted to Angel, he was so
extremely beautiful, sensitive, and kind. And in that moment that they had
just shared she could have sworn that just maybe he felt attracted to her
also. Who was she kidding.



At that moment she made a conscious decision, she was here
to enjoy herself not worry about a guy. She would have fun. She was
determined. She got up and walked into Cordelia's kitchen to find something
to eat. She decided to go simple and just eat cereal. "Okay, so where are
the bowls?" she said to herself in frustration. A cabinet opened revealing
the bowls. "Thank you Dennis."



Apparently Willow must have woken up late because everyone
had already eaten. She glanced at the clock and realized it was already
eleven. She quickly finished her breakfast and went in search of Cordelia.
They managed to run into each other both shouting the others name.



"So Cordy what do you have planned for today?"

"Well I was thinking shopping!" she said hopefully.

"Sounds great, don't look so surprised. I told you about
how I was having a hard time in Sunnydale and how I had that dream of me
being the same as I was in High school. I figured what better way to
alleviate that fear than go shopping for a whole new me."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you it will be so much fun. I
am so picking out your wardrobe."

Willow groaned maybe this wasn't such a great idea or maybe
it just might be fun. About half an hour later the girls were dressed and
ready to go. Just as they were headed out the door Angel stopped them.



"Where are you going ?"

"Shopping," Cordelia answered still walking to the door.

"Here," Angel said.

Cordelia saw a flash of gold and immediately caught it.
"Thanks."

"We can't take that," Willow said shocked.

"Buy whatever you want."

"Just keep walking Willow its alright," Cordelia said
pushing Willow through the door.



The girls spent all day shopping only stopping to eat
lunch. They hadn't bought as much as Willow expected but it was still a
lot. Cordelia was overjoyed to have a shopping buddy. They talked so much
and neither had anything to hide from each other. It gave them a chance to
bond and become even closer than they already were.



When they got home Willow decided to call Giles and let
everyone know she was alright.

"'Ello."

"Hey Spike, why are you answering the phone."

Just then Angel walked in and asked Willow who she was
talking to.

"Bloody hell witch why is Peaches at your Aunt's house," he
said already knowing where she really was.

"Spike please don't tell anyone, but I'm staying at
Cordelia's and so are Angel and Wesley."

Spike growled when Xander grabbed the phone from him.

"Hey Wills how's your aunts house?"

"Hey Xander it's great. I gotta go I just wanted to check
in with you guys. How are things back home any major Baddies."

"Nope, but we'll e-mail you if we need help, gotta go, love
you Wills"

Willow could hear Anya whining in the background. "Love
you to." She said and hung up. Spike immediately called back.

"Why the bloody hell are you staying with 'im luv!"

"Spike be quiet someone will hear you!"

"Everyone's left and watchers asleep."

"I told you how I was having such a hard, I needed to have
some fun."

"You coulda 'ad fun with me." He said stubbornly

"I'm sorry I needed to get away."

"Red," he whined," what am I supposed to do with you gone?"

"I'm really sorry, you can call whenever you want." "I
have to go Spike bye."



Willow got up and went to change completely ignoring the
look of shock on Angels face as he heard her conversation with Spike. She
had expected as much, but she had a night of clubbing to prepare for.



Part 7



Willow and Cordelia were about to leave when Angel
stopped them. "I'm going with you." Angel said eying Willow's crimson
leather hip huggers and her sparkling red halter. God she looked sinful.
Angel intended on keeping a close eye on her all night.



Willow felt surprisingly confident and the look Angel just
gave her only helped.



The club they were at was fairly new and had plenty of cute
guys not to mention great music. Willow was sipping her drink as she
watched Cordelia dance with a Latin hunk. She wanted to dance but didn't
know if she was quite that bold. Finally a rather cute blond came up,
noticing that her and Angel didn't appear close, he asked her to dance. She
accepted. At first she felt a little awkward but as she began to
concentrate on the beat of the music she became quite good. After the song
was over she found another guy waiting to dance with her only boosting her
confidence more.



Angel watched jealously as guy after guy went up to Willow
dancing with her. With each dance her movements became more: bold, sexual,
sensual. Angel couldn't take his eyes off her only wishing that that was
him dancing with her, wishing he had accepted earlier when she had asked him
to dance.



Willow was having so much fun but she couldn't help but
keep steeling glances at Angel. Wishing she was dancing with him. But he
had refused her. She felt a new man grab her from behind wrapping his arms
around her waist as the music slowed. Curious she turned around.



"Angel!"

"Willow," god did she feel great in his arms.

"I thought you didn't dance."

"I changed my mind." With that said he turned her back
around and pulled her back to him, intimately resting her head on his chest.
As the song played all he could think about was how wonderful this was.
Their bodies fit perfectly, her hair just smelled intoxicating, and the
warmth of her body pressed against his. The danced closely for a few
songs. When the music became more upbeat again he took her hand and led her
back to the table.



That night Cordelia went home with Some man she had been
dancing with the whole night. Willow and Angel had spent the evening
talking about anything and everything. Angel never let go of her hand. They
walked back to Cordelia's apartment. They sat on the couch and continued
there conversation where they had left off. Willows head was resting on
angels lap. As the had a comfortable silence a look passed between them.
The same look they had shared that morning. The moved closer until there
faces were merely inches apart, closing their eyes anticipating the kiss.



"Angel are you in there," called Kate's voice as she barged
in the door.

Willow and Angel jumped apart.

"In here Kate."

Willow recognized the name from their long conversation.

"Angel could I talk to you alone."

Willow took the hint and went into one of the bedrooms.

"Angel I've been thinking a lot lately, and well what you
are I can just put it past me, as long as you don't bring it up."

"Kate I am a vampire I can't pretend I'm not I've learned
that doesn't work to well."

"I know I just am saying that I could . . . forget."

"Okay, what are you getting at?"

"Angel I think that it's okay for us to have a relationship
now."

"Kate I don't think -"

"No it's okay I know you won't hurt me." She said leaning
up and kissing him holding his head in place. Angel was in shock taking him
a second to react. But in that second Willow had gotten up to go to the
bathroom and had seen them she ran back to the room not hearing what was
said. She had to get out of there. She and Angel had almost kissed not
five minutes ago. She thought he liked her, she thought she felt it
stronger than anything before. She walked into the living room.

"Angel I'm going for a walk."

"Okay he answered distractedly not noticing the tears
running down her face.



She walked out into the dark night not noticing what was in front of her she
just continued walking, shivering in the cold. She had already wandered 6
blocks.

Spike was driving down the street looking for Cordelia's. He had come to
convince Willow to come back home. If she wanted to get away she could get
away with him. She was his best friend and he didn't want her being
influenced by Angel or so he told himself. Just then he saw a flash of Red
hair. Only the Willow he knew wouldn't wear an out fit like that. The he
saw her face. She was crying and it was Willow, and god did she have a nice
body or what. He turned the car around preparing to pick her up just as she
wandered out into the middle of the street. He rolled down the window.
Just then he saw a car speeding towards her.

Willow saw the flash of head lights and then what sounded like Spike calling
out her name as pain filled her body until she blacked out.

Part 8

"WILLOW!"

Spike stopped his car, blocking the street, watching as the car that hit Willow sped in the opposite direction. He was to panicked to stop them or even get a license plate number.
"No Red, you can’t do this to me!"

He held Willow’s broken body in her arms, wiping away the blood dripping down her forehead. He was uncharacteristically shaking and crying as he rocked them both back and forth. Spike noticed a faint and slowing heartbeat from Willow and quickly ran to his car driving them to the hospital.

He entered the emergency room yelling at one of the staff nurses as she asked him for insurance information. He dug out Willow’s wallet before she was taken away. After a few hours of pacing and blaming everybody he knew he decided to call them all and yell at them. Let them know what they did. Well he couldn’t call the slayer and her friends, they would just come here and annoy him. So he guessed it would have to be Angel or the cheerleader.

"Hello."
"YOU BLOODY BASTARD! I hate you. What were you thinking letting Red go walking at 2:00a.m, by herself in L.A.!?!"
"What are you-"
"Shut up I’m not done yet. YOU! It’s all your fault, I knew she shouldn’t have come here. That’s why I came to get her!"
"Spike where are you?" Angel growled.
"The hospital 10 blocks from the cheerleaders. Now let me finish!" But Angel had already hung up.

Angel grabbed his key and ran out the door. Why couldn’t Spike just tell him what happened. He would have hung up sooner but he needed to know where they were. The Hospital. Please let Willow be alright. What was Spike talking about. He thought Willow had gone to sleep in Cordelia’s room back when Kate was there. He should have checked. Now he remembered her slipping out the door. Maybe whatever happened was his fault. Just please let Willow be okay.

"Rosenberg?"
Spike immediately stood up.
"Are you family?"
"I’m William her fiancé."
"Well William I’m afraid I have some bad news about Ms. Rosenberg." He said solemnly.


Part 9

"Rosenberg?"
Spike immediately stood up.
"Are you family?"
"I’m William her fiancé."
"Well William I’m afraid I have some bad news about Ms. Rosenberg." He said solemnly.
"What is it," he said impatiently.
"Well she’s in critical condition. We don’t know if she’ll make it. She’s in a coma, and we’ve done everything we can. She has a fractured arm and rib. And two severe head wounds. The problem is she has to want to wake up, to want to live."
"Thank you, can I see her?"
"She’s being moved right now, but we’ll send a nurse when you can."


Spike paced the waiting room. He didn’t know what he would do without her. She was the reason he hadn’t staked himself all those months ago. She was the only person he could really call a friend and now she was in danger of dying, all because she had to come see bloody stupid peaches. It’s all his fault. All his fault. He continued pacing the room.
"William you can see Ms. Rosenberg now. Follow me please."
He nervously followed anxious to see his Willow. The nurse left him and he rushed to her side. She looked so horribly hurt. Her face bruised and cut. There was blood in her hair, there must have been a gash hidden there. He could only imagine what her torso looked like, directly where the car had hit her.

Angel ran into the hospital and immediately to the nurses station. "I need to find Willow Rosenberg!"
"Only family can see her now."
"I’m her fiancé," he said without hesitation.
"Sir, her fiancé is already in there."
Angel was confused. Willow wasn’t engaged was she. He looked down and saw the nurses clipboard with Willow’s room number. It was the same room Cordelia had been in. He ran off with the nurse yelling after him.

Spike grabbed her unharmed hand and stared at her beautiful face. For the first time in his unlife he was speechless. He hurt so much on the inside, never knowing he could care so much for anyone, especially a human. He hadn’t even felt this close to Druscilla and they were romantically involved. The part that hurt the most was that Spike had never treated Willow like he cared, she probably didn’t know he did. He vowed that if she ever woke up he would treat her different. He slowly climbed into bed beside her. And that’s how Angel found them.


Part 10
Spike had fallen asleep next to Willow, trying to hold her close without hurting her. Angel had run all the way to her room through the complicated halls and stopped outside her door. He sensed Spike was in the room. (That's who her fiancé was, he better not be) He opened the door to see Spike lying next to Willow. He knew nothing of the condition Willow was in, simply figuring the two had fallen asleep on the bed. He began to scan Willow's figure. The first thing he noticed was Spike's death grip on her hand. Then he saw her cast on the other arm. He began wondering what happened to her. The rest of her body was covered. He could only see her scraped, bruised face and her shining red hair.
Angel was furious with Spike just for being here. He was mad at Kate. The nerve of her. How could she tell him she could just forget. What if he didn't want to forget. He was a vampire and he always would be. He couldn't be with some one who couldn't accept who he was. That's why he would probably never be with anyone ever. It was part of why he could never be with Buffy. He wasn't sure if he had even been in love with her, or just made himself think he was. The forbidden love factor had just been too tempting. And Kate who said he even wanted to be with her. She just assumed he was attracted to her. He wasn't she was to uptight and flighty. Then there was Willow. He had wanted something to happen between the two of them. Now he was not so sure. She was just so innocent. He didn't want to take that away from her. To taint her. He really didn't deserve her. Here was acting like Kate. He was already deciding to turn her away without even knowing if she would have him in the first place. Maybe she wanted Spike. He would never let that happen.
As he continued to look at Willow he began to worry, not exactly remembering why Willow had gone out. He had been distracted. Why was Spike here in L.A.? Why was he lying in this bed with Willow? He wanted answers, and he wanted them now.

Part 11


"SPIKE!"
Before he even opened his eyes Spike could sense Angel in the room. The Bastard didn't even deserve to be here. Spike was sure that this was some how Angel's fault. He slowly opened his eyes. Ignoring Angel he took his time to look once more at Willow and gently let go of her hand, kissed her cheek, then stood up; instantly missing her warmth.

"Peaces why did you even let Red come here? You know L.A. is dangerous. What did you do to her? Don't bother saying it wasn't your fault, I know it was. Who knows why she was cryin' over you, but she was. How could you let her walk alone at 2:00a.m!"

Angel was shocked to say the least. Spike sounded really truly concerned. Why had Willow been crying? He honestly couldn't think why.

"I can't answer any of your questions, but could you try and answer mine," he said solemnly, "how is she."
"She's in a coma. Broke a rib and 'er arm. Doc says she has to want to live to wake up. My Red's a fighter. Why wouldn't she want to wake up, Angel why?" Spike cried desperately.
Angel had never seen such raw emotion as he had just seen in Spike's eyes. He was on the verge of tears (he had even called me Angel, he never does). Angel didn't know what to say or do. Spike was right. She is a fighter. He called her his Red, his. Am I missing something. What happened why was she crying. Why wouldn't she want to wake up, why wouldn't she want to live. She had to live. He loved her. He didn't know what form his love took on but he did love her. He couldn't live without her.

Spike felt just the same. He didn't know exactly how he felt about her, but he knew that if she died so would he. He knew he was acting pathetic for a vampire but he was at a loss. Willow was absolutely the only person in his life. She had stopped him from killing himself, now he vowed to do the same for her. He would give her the will to live. He just had to figure out how.

Angel and Spike just stood looking into each other's hopeless and torn faces, neither knowing what to say or do.



Spike looked Away from Angel and made his way over to
Willow's side. He got back into the bed and laid down beside her.
"Spike Sunrise is in less then an hour."
"So!"
"There is no way to block the sun."
"I don't `ave anywhere to go."
"You can stay at Cordelia's."
"Fine, but only cause I want to live to see Red wake up."
Spike kissed Willow on the forehead, and slowly walked away. Angel
followed suit whispering. (I love you Willow, don't give up on me.)

They drove home in silence. Neither willing to speak to the
other. They slowly made their way into Cordelia's Apartment.
"You'll have to sleep in the room with me the couch is in the direct
sunlight."
"The hall, bathroom, my room and the kitchen are fine. There's blood
in the fridge. Let's get out of this room before sunrise."
Angel grabbed an extra pillow and blanket off the couch knowing they
were Willow's. And they made their way into the room.
"I'll sleep on the floor Spike you can have the bed." He had a
feeling Spike wasn't even paying attention. Could him and Willow
really have been that close. He looked over and saw Spike grab
willow's sweater off the table. Spike took it with him and climbed
into the bed. Not even bothering to take off his shoes. Angel had
never seen his child this upset. Not even after Dru. He could hear
Spike's faint sobs. Angel lied down on the floor burying his face in
the pillow that smelled of Willow. Could this really have been his
fault. What could he have done to make Willow cry. He was about to
cry himself. He loved Willow so much. He didn't even have a chance
to explore his feelings. See what kind of love he really had for her.

Spike lie in the bed tears dripping down his face as he grasped
Willow's sweater like a lifeline. He felt so pathetic. Here he was
crying over a human, but she was so special. He loved her. If she
were to die then so would he. She was his only friend in the world.
He knew Angel loved her. He was beginning to think that Willow loved
Angel to, why else would she have been crying. He kept replaying the
site of her getting hit by the car over and over in his head. If he
had only left Sunnydale one minute earlier. Spike knew Willow loved
him as a friend. She had told him that much herself. Maybe that's
where his feelings stopped for her, but he really couldn't be sure.

Both Vampires contemplated the depth of love for their Willow.
Wondering how they could have possibly save her.

Part 13

Willow was lost somewhere inside herself, somewhere where
time and space didn't exist, only memories and dreams. She didn't
remember how she got here but she didn't think it would hurt to stay
awhile. Why end her dream when she had nothing to look forward to.
She had left Sunnydale for a reason, only to find nothing for her in
L.A. but more of the same. Disappointment. It seemed to be all she
ever had to look for her in life. Whenever she thought something was
going good for her she would be shown the truth. Maybe she was
cursed to live like this forever, or maybe she could just stay in
this dreamscape forever. It seemed peaceful enough for her. There
was a distant tugging in her brain, but she decided it didn't matter
at the moment.

Willow wandered through a place that she was creating as she
went. She envisioned beautiful rolling hills, flowers, a river and a
waterfall, a starry night without the fear of evil. Falling
gracefully into the grass she gazed up at the stars thinking this was
what she needed, maybe she could stay here forever. No one would hurt
her here, no one could.

Angel was the first to wake. He hadn't slept well at all.
The only thing he could seem to think of was Willow. Where had these
sudden feelings come from. Was it even possible for him to feel this
strongly for her so suddenly. He had spent years with her and had
never once even imagined her anything more than a friend, and not
even a really close one at that. It had always been about Buffy.
But Willow had changed and so had he.

After making his way to the kitchen Angel fixed Spike and
Himself some blood. They would be able to go to the hospital soon.

Spike sat up in bed wishing it was all a dream. Of course
having his luck it wasn't. He was at Cordelia's house and his best
friend was in a coma. He racked his brain for any sort of
inspiration to pull her back, but what did he have to offer. It was
sunset. Grabbing the mug of blood Angel left him, Spike made his way
to his car without even sparing his Grandsire a glance. As he headed
to the hospital Spike promised himself that he would convince Willow
to come back to him. He needed some one in his life, and the way he
saw it, Willow was his last hope.

"Hello William," the same nurse was working as the last
night. "I'm sorry, but your fiancé's condition is the same. They say
her subconscious can hear you . . . just let her know how much you
love her."
"Thanks, I will," he replied as he made his way to his
friends room. He slowly entered Willow's room devastated by her
deathly form before his eyes. She always looked so happy; she was
always optimistic. The look on her face last night made her hardly
recognizable, she looked devastated. She was the only smart one in
the Scooby gang, and he she was smart enough not to run out in the
middle of the night.

"What happened Willow."

Angel entered the Hospital followed by Cordelia.
"Excuse me I'm looking for Willow Rosenberg."
"I'm sorry miss family only."
"Look she doesn't have any family that cares enough to be
here, she is living with me and me and my friend here are the closest
thing to family she has, now what room is she in?"
"I see miss room 222."
"Thank you," Cordelia flashed the nurse a grateful smile.
She could hardly believe Angel when he told her the news. She just
hoped Willow would be okay.

Spike laid beside Willow cradling her hand in his.
"Willow remember the second time I tried to kill myself, you
told me that you were my friend and that you would always be their
for me. And I needed to keep living cause I had someone that would
love me no matter what. Willow you're my best friend and I love you
and no matter what happened to you last night I love you and that's
got to be reason enough to keep going, you told me all a person ever
needed was some one to love them."

Wherever Willow was she was asleep but in the distance she
could hear a pained Spike's voice. He was her friend and she wanted
him to be ok. "I love you Willow."

Spike watched a gentle smile grace Willow's face as she
whispered, "I love you too Spike."

And that was what Cordelia and Angel heard as they entered
the room.